Stupid Comics

As if the Sea Monkeys debacle wasn't a big enough scam, this comics ad from the 1960s not only got kids to pay for a large cutout of a Monster from Outer Space, but also tried to bamboozle those hip young mods out of a dollar by making them think that it could also talk. This 48" piece of latex apparently came with some sort of joints or stretchable parts that allowed its gullible owner to make it appear as if the 2-D marionette was moving on its own. The real gripe any potential buyer would have is that the rubbery rip off was somehow capable of speech by claiming it can talk on its own, meaning unless there was some kind of intrinsic audio wiring system threaded on the inside of its apparatus that it wouldn't work like that. Regency Mail Order hopefully refunded several dissatisfied customers for being gypped on this jive offering after shilling out a solid dollar bill.

Bob Powell is best known for the artwork he did for the Mars Attacks card series, although one if his most obscure routines was doing the artwork for this replacement in Harvey Comics' Joe Palooka series filling in for Jack Kirby's Flying Fool. Atoma is bizarre a 6.5-page story framed for 7-pages filled up at the end by a Green Hornet ad to which each page is literally framed in a number-shaped layout. Young Dusty Rhodes(no relation to the wrestler)is a chemist working out of his lab in Anytown, USA when he unintentionally mixed together an explosion that sends him to the year 2446. Once there, Dusty is greeted by Atoma, a hot little number in a jet-powered bat outfit who claims to be a historian that knew he would be arriving at this time in the future according to his past memoirs. This leaves out the whole paradox of if Dusty hadn't travelled to the future, then he wouldn't have returned back to his own era, which is of course impossible. The batlady in the mini-skir...

Where Larry Storch and the other "real Ghostbusters" wouldn't show up until 1970's Saturday Mornings, one of the first paranormal eliminators was Drew Murdock. Hosting a segment in Jumbo Comics titled The Ghost Gallery, Drew was the host as well as star of various cases where he acts as the John Constantine of the 1940s. Unlike most Scooby-Doo villains, the monsters were actually real and not someone in a mask trying to scare off meddling kids. Drew would make the occasional oversight like trying to kill a werewolf with a wooden stake or just blowing up a ghost. This didn't stop other professionals from asking his advice as his reputation lassoed police, attorneys and reporters into getting his careered opinion on a mystery. Sometimes the genuine monsters were summoned by novices using forbidden arts to summon zombies so they could gain an inheritance, making it more like a cartoon plot but done with real voodoo instead of novice Halloween costumes. On his own, Dr...

Count Dante was an almost mythological figure from the late 1960s. The World Federation of Fighting Arts reportedly awarded him the title of "World's Deadliest Fighting Arts Champion And Master". This level fame made him the Bruce Lee of the west aside from not having an active film career. His abrupt death in his sleep during his mid-30s left its mark in the kung-fu culture of the 70s. Prior to this, he had an infamous ad that allowed people to join his Black Dragon Fighting Society where you can get a membership card and other sweet swag. The most popular was Dante's book of World's Deadliest Fighting Secrets which would later inspire characters like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles to come out with their own fighting manuals. But, just knowing that your kids would be thumbing through Bugs Bunny comics in the Silver Age and could send away for the "Deadly Arts" to learn how to kill the neighborhood bullies with Dante's patented Dim Mak(aka: touch o...

Even though he was one of the few comics characters from the 1940s that got their own official club, Zarro the Great from the titular Great Comics had a lifespan of only three issues in its title. Also known as The Great Zarro, he got started like a lot of superheroes as a circus performer originally billed as Eagle-Man. Zarro was granted the power of flight from a fortune teller with mystic herbs, and now uses his singular supernatural ability to snuff out enemy agents from to sabotaging a dam. Along with his obligatory homeless young sidekick Rags, Zarro kept his old circus attire when saving lives. Aside from his athletic physique, Zarro's power of flight apparently includes soaring at speeds faster than a plane as he can catch air pirates, although his "greatness" doesn't prevent him from getting hit over the head with a blackjack. His last adventure apparently has a time skip as it cuts to sometime later after WWII has begun with Rags going through a serious grow...