Stupid Comics

"Comics" McCormick could be viewed as being history's first fan fiction writer. Created by Ed Wheelan, the young boy named Comics is a member of the The Little Conquerors Social And Reading Club where they talk about comic book characters. Mr. McCormick would regularly have dreams where he had crossovers with the various fictional superheroes that run in the comics that "Comics" is a fan of. In Terrific Comics #5, "Comics" and his friends are fanboying about the latest character, Bingo, who was a parody of the original Captain Marvel(the Shazam one). In his own story, whenever Jerry Jones Jr. would say "Ka-bang", he changes into Bingo the Wonder Boy, which of course is a name out of a baker's dozen of young comic book characters with a similar moniker, including Batman's old chum. "Comics" tries out the magic word and summons up Yama Lama of Ka-Bang, a racist caricature of a Tibetan guru which here is a wish-granting genie. ...

Having nothing to the Golden Age superhero of the same name, or the Batman villain, or the gag character from Fairly Oddparents, Catman was an Australian comic book hero created by Frew Publications. He was another feline-based good guy with an assortment of gizmos that were also all feline-based, similar to how a certain Caped Crusader had all his gear labeled the Bat-something-or-other. The Aussie Catman was a combination of both the Dark Knight and another popular American superhero, The Phantom, a King Features Syndicate comic strip who has enjoyed success in various media including a decent live-action movie. The Phantom's fandom in Australia was bursting at the seams and was reprinted in 1951 for kangaroo country in the anthology series, Super Yank Comics, which is also where this version of Catman first premiered. This is like a foreign publisher republishing Spider-Man comics for a compilation along with installments of their own original creation named "Spider-Buddy...

Amazing colossal men aren't a new concept from the atomic age but Sleeping Giant from Mysteries Of Unexplored Worlds #40 turns the peculiarity up to 11. Starring the satirically named Captain Adam Chase of the space patrol, the reportedly raving madman tells a space newsman about a routine assignment that sent him straight to the space loony bin. Chase was buzzing around for a new planet for humans to colonize, the first one was too poisonous, the second has kaiju frogs, the third was too hot, and the next was too cold. Chase finally finds his Goldilocks choice on Mentalla II as it looks just right, even though there is a rocky terrain that resembles a giant human shape. Adam lands to investigate the humanoid pile of pebble, and spends the night outside in his sleeping bag, only to be rudely awakened by the granite Goliath which turns out to be a large living being. Capt. Chase books out of there in his rocket just barely escaping getting turned into the giant's new action figu...

Want to know how to not only tolerate women but actually get along with them? Then you'll need this book almost mockingly titled, How To Get Along With Girls. The book premiered in the mid-1940's as an attempt to turn the baby boom into a nuclear explosion and ran an ad in various comics, usually teenage humor titles like Wilbur or of the romantic genre like Darling Love. In fact, the ad ran in comics well into the 1950's despite of the fact that some of the data in it was a decade out of date. Nevertheless, this book is still in print today through several independent publishers as a nostalgia novelty like old girly magazines. The ad promotes the book as a know-it-all to the "ABC to XYZ of successful stragedy" when it comes to laying claim to a lady's attention. It declares that any novice young bachelor can use psychology to attract them all the way from first dates to proposing. The 80-page book could be yours for 98 cents back in the good old days which is...

Similar to Golden Girl, Yellowjacket Jr. is a spinoff superhero that never actually meets up with their source character. The very first comic book character to use the name Yellowjacket was not from Marvel but Frank Communale Comics which eventually became known as Charlton Comics. The founding Yellowjacket was a writer of crime fiction that somehow gains the power to control bees. This ability must have been hereditary because his nephew Tom has the same ability. Where Uncle Yellowjacket had a decent career in his own self-titled comic, Yellowjacket Jr. got only a single appearance in of all things the first issue of a funny animal anthology titled Zoo Funnies. Tom is called Buzz by his friends because of his weird expertise, but they also call him Yellowjacket Jr. having no knowledge of the secret identity of Buzz's uncle. Buzz can control bees with a special whistle like the Pied Piper, an act that his friends believe would come in handy for an upcoming war bonds talent show. B...

Stuck with one of the most cryptic names in comics was the crimefighter known as Alias the Dragon. Whether its "Alias the Dragon" like "Winnie the Pooh", or if its pronounced alias "The Dragon" is largely confusing as everyone refers to him in the story as "Alias the Dragon", so it appears to be more the former. Gaining only a single appearance in Chesler's 1944 one shot Skyrocket Comics, Alias was a standard cop-turned-vigilante character that was rampant in the Golden Age. Maurice Whitman made this stock superhero who doubled as police scientist Bill Norton in the forensics department. He was stumped by a series of robbers that target armored cars on cash runs with explosives. Sgt. Norton examines a piece of evidence left at the latest crime which the police captain shows nothing but contempt for the beaker jockey, believing only in action, not science. Bill slips into his alias of Alias the Dragon and tracks the crooks to their hideout. Al...

Vern Henkel worked on a diverse number of titles from 1930's on up and was responsible for creating several original action/adventure characters like Chic Carter, Wings Wendell, and Gallant Knight. One of these characters made his premiere in Quality's Smash Comics #1 with the noticeably obvious brand of "Abdul the Arab" because he was an Arab named Abdul. That would be like any random guy from the U.S. being referred to as "Bob the American". The comic was eventually taken under the wing of Powell Roberts that tried to break him out of the stereotype of being a "guy from foreign country". Abdul was the son of chieftain Ali Bey that operated in Arabia during the early days of WWII. He and his tutor and comrade Hassan would go on a variety of adventures usually helping out the British Intelligence operating in the Middle East, as well as heroic exploits like solving crimes, crossing swords with kidnappers, wrecking raiders, foiling fowl cults, and o...