Stupid Comics

Honor House strikes again. The dispensers of x-ray specs, wrist radios, sea monkeys, and nuclear mini-subs also tried to sell this totally unnecessary bicycle accessory. Honor House Production Corp. created a half-page ad for a scant few comics during the Silver Age that was supposed to fit most of your average bikes at the time, a full-sized windshield that you could get for only a dollar. Intended to be a wind deflector for the casual neighborhood bike rider, this transparent vinyl layered bird poop projector was made with modern "trampoline construction" which would be great if you were using a trampoline and not buying this flimsy thing. Intended to act similar to a windshield for motorcycles, this one for bikes comes only with a pair of brittle clamps to hold it in place, even though it does have the bonus of a pouch in case you wanted to keep your car keys in it. There's a 10-day free trial, but no word if you get your quarter for shipping back. The ad claims the wi...

Before his Wizard King Trilogy, Wally Wood had another otherworldly outing in a one-shot story from the first issue of Captain Science by Youth Publications which was one of their few sci-fi titles as they specialized in westerns. In a story not connected to the title character, Wood's The Monster God Of Rogor has archeologist Tayne Whitney investigating the markings on an ancient crystal orb which transports him to strange realm of Banthu, like all crystal balls are known to do. This mysterious land is ran by the luscious high priestess Maryl and the inhabitants see Tayne as your standard savior sent from another world to light their darkest hour. The ones threatening the lively Banthu lifestyle are the forces of Rogor, a monster god whose priests shove their doctrine into those who don't give generously to their chosen deity. Rogor's main rep is Sek, a frog-faced freak who doesn't buy into Banthu's messiah prophecy, and leaves Tayne alone in a cell with Maryl wher...

Triumph Comics, also called Triumph Adventure Comics, was published in Canada by Hillborough Studios in 1941. Most comic historians are familiar with their premiere character of Nelvanna of the Northern Lights who was the first Canadian superheroine, but they also managed to have one of those, "we're too lazy to finish the artwork, so you do it for us" drawing contests. Once Bell Features bought out Hillborough, they changed the title to just Triumph Comics, and one of their ads was for a free event where they drew out the bodies of three separate characters but expected the rank amateurs to fill in the rest. The characters were supposedly a flamboyant sailor, a standard comics good girl, and person of short stature who most would probably picture as being a food mascot or a Mr. Monopoly clone. While the effort put into this is minimal, it included ripping out a page from a Golden Age comic book and sending it to the publisher which critically devalues the price for any f...